August? Oh, honey.
I can't even finish a full cup of coffee before it gets cold, let alone a blog post. I started this one
End of Octoberish
Yeah, oops on not updating sooner. We had a baby! Serafina is doing great and recovery has been a breeze {relatively speaking} this time around but birth story and details to follow; when I have time to write more coherently then mere stream of consciousness.
Three. I'm outnumbered.
I don't work on Mondays or Fridays and preschool for Carina and Aurelia is Tues-Wed-Thurs so it's just me and all three until Mike gets home from work in the evenings.
Today, everyone was sick but Mike, myself included. The baby woke up with a barking cough just before 5 AM and after an hour of nursing and bouncing and soothing she was still staring at me, wide awake. She finally fell asleep on my chest but not before blowing out her diaper. What's a Mom to do? You better believe I let her sleep on me poop and all. Although, I can't blame this on the 3rd child mentality. I've been known to do this before.
This Mom of 3 thing is hard.
Excuse me, gotta go. The baby just woke up crying after a 20 minute nap. Send wine.
Now
At the beginning of the year I started a new job which requires me to go on-site one day a week. I work from home on Mondays and Wednesdays, and on Fridays you'll find me baby in one arm while applying mascara with the other. I've mastered pumping while shoveling Raisin Bran down the hatch and brushing one of the big girls' hair into a pretty ponytail all at the same time.
My heart is full -- I'm the happiest I've been in as long as I can remember -- but I'm also the most stressed out. There's this constant nagging that something needs to be done, or cleaned, or paid, or fed, and the responsibility of everything I do and need to do just weighs on me.
I usually can't see the floor of the laundry room and I'm lucky if I remember to get more milk before we run out. We still have unpacked boxes from the move last year and the toy mess is slowly encroaching upon every single room in the house (even the closet in our bedroom...how does that happen?) I'm sure there's something more I should be doing with Carina to prepare her for Kindergarten in the Fall and with Aurelia to help with her tantrums and sensitivity. And the baby? I don't even remember what I was doing with the big girls at her age...helping them to crawl? Working on words?
Despite all this, I have more smiles, belly laughs, and endless snuggles than I ever thought possible. The girls are so sweet and we have so much fun going for bike rides, playing with dolls, or lining up all of their "guys" and pretending to have epic battles. Carina and Aurelia are best friends and expert big sisters. There's nothing more rewarding than watching these beings that you created interact with each other.
By the time the girls are in bed all I can muster is the energy to stay awake. Sometimes I'm asleep by 10:30, which is early for me. Other nights my mind wanders through all the things that still need to be done and the clock becomes my enemy as it nears midnight. Then it's time to wake up and rinse, repeat.
At least, with this post, I can cross one thing off of the "desperately need to-do" list ;)
